Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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