there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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