I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
