She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
