I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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