Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
