Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
