His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
