are you still at the devil's house?
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My bed smells like the plague
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
