Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
