Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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