Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
