More tranny stories later!
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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