You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
