We're like a lot better than the average bears
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
