I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
