My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Terrible idea I love it
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
