how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
