I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I think my moral compass just broke
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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