Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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