Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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