Non-Jews are for practice
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
