we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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