I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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