So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
