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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
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