One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
