dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
