we're blogging at a bar
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Your penis caused this!
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