The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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