Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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