I need help removing her.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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