rhymes with "ouble enetration"
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
