I feel great
I just peed on a car
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
