My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
