He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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