New invention idea: vibrating tampons
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
