ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
