Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize