i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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