i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
