dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
