See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
