I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
