If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
