I CAN MOONWALK!
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
