So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Randomize
