You made me cry and you don't even care
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
