You can't motorboat a personality
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
