stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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